NEW YORK, NY – In a surprising annoucement this morning, Fiction officially admitted that Truth is much stranger than it will ever hope to be. “Fiction has put up a valiant struggle over the years in an effort to be stranger than anything real or factual,” said Fiction spokesperson Mickey Solls. “But frankly, it’s time to throw in the towel. Congratulations, Truth—you win.”

This announcement comes just a few weeks after the Supreme Court dismissed the case of Fiction v. Truth, which reverted back to the lower court decision in Truth’s favor. “The relative nature of Truth makes it so much stranger than Fiction,” wrote Judge Santmoor in his opinion. “And don’t get me started on truthiness. In short: You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth! Ha. I’ve always wanted to use that.” 

A string of recent events were apparently the last straws that forced Fiction to reassess and accept its existential worth. Solls explained: “Nuclear reactors on the moon? Cancellation of mRNA vaccine research? Ghislaine Maxwell moved to a Texas minimum security prison? MGK is part alien? No magical realism in the world can even come close to keeping up with this shit.”
Fiction has no plans for the immediate future, and will catch up on episodes of Severance. Truth, currently on vacation in the Caribbean with friends Life and Art, could not be reached for comment.