ISRAEL – A protester on the streets of Jerusalem yesterday discussed with The Perineal the desire to push the Israeli government to accelerate the takeover of Gaza and other Palestinian land. This is mainly due to the recent recognition of the Palestinian State by the UK and other governments. The concern is that Israel was established under a similar treaty in 1948, which could lend validity to the matter and make the Palestinian State permanent.
Several options were discussed within the tight circles of the extremist group on possible options to displace the remaining inhabitants of the Gaza Strip quickly:
- Bribe the Egyptian Government with Baklava and Tea so they will take the refugees from Gaza.
- Broadcast through loudspeakers the Adhan 24 hours per day so that the local Muslims do not have time to eat or drink.
- Provide a one-way ticket to each citizen of Gaza to London.
- Replace all humanitarian food with pork and vodka.
- Broadcast Israeli Soap Opera 24 hours per day on all channels.
- Establish a New Palestinian State on Mars with triple the land area as an incentive.
- Use nuclear weapons to scare off locals (this was quickly shot down since nuclear waste land has little value).
- Pray for it to happen three times a day and hope for divine intervention.
The protestors confessed that they were still working on better solutions to offer to Netanyahu on his return from the US today. They planned for further discussions at Yosef’s dinner party followed by prayer.
