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March 26, 2025
Kamala, Hillary Bonding Effort Leads to Holitistic Retreat Business Partnership
Lifestyle
March 26, 2025

CHAPPAQUA, New York – Kamala Harris and Hillary Clinton have gone into business together, launching a partnership in the form of a holistic retreat in the Vermont countryside. The as yet unnamed retreat will feature all of the usual trappings, including a spa, swimming pool, pilates classes, cooking instruction, and group bonding activities. The two…

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March 25, 2025
Baseball Spring Training Begins, White Sox Eliminated from Playoff Race
Sports
March 25, 2025

Although spring training for Major League Baseball has just begun, the Chicago White Sox have already been officially eliminated from the 2025 American League playoff race. While spring training is a time of hope and renewal for teams looking ahead to the start of the regular season, there is little hope for the White Sox,…

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March 24, 2025
Kelly Osbourne A Huge Fan of Shooting Up Ozempic, Only In It For Weight Loss
Entertainment
March 24, 2025

KENSIGNTON, Philadelphia — Citing the miraculous weight-loss effects of shooting up Ozempic, former drug addict Kelly Osbourne has declared it a revolutionary breakthrough. Having dabbled in Percocet, Vicodin, and heroin in her younger years, up to the age of 39, Osbourne insists that her “primary addiction” had always been food.   “Drugs have always made me feel…

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March 23, 2025
Vegan Woman Outed to Friends in Tagged Family Photo Chowing Down on Chicken Wings in Background
Lifestyle
March 23, 2025

LOS ANGELES, CA – A scandal has rocked the vegan community after Aliyah Bennett, a long-time animal rights advocate and PETA employee, was caught devouring chicken wings at a family barbecue, completely lost in her own world. The photo, uploaded by her mother on Facebook, showed Aliyah happily chomping on a plate of wings, sending…

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March 19, 2025
Exploring the Wonders of Our Solar System. The beauty of our Milky Way and Galaxy.
Trending
March 19, 2025

ASTORIA, Oregon – The Solar System, a vast and intriguing ensemble, serves as the cosmic neighborhood for Earth. Anchored by the Sun at its center, this celestial system comprises eight primary planets, each offering unique characteristics and mysteries. Mercury, the closest planet to the Sun, is a small, rocky world with extreme temperatures. Venus, often…

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March 18, 2025
A Journey Through the Solar System
Breaking
March 18, 2025

ASTORIA, Oregon – The Solar System, a vast and intriguing ensemble, serves as the cosmic neighborhood for Earth. Anchored by the Sun at its center, this celestial system comprises eight primary planets, each offering unique characteristics and mysteries. Mercury, the closest planet to the Sun, is a small, rocky world with extreme temperatures. Venus, often…

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March 17, 2025
The Cosmic Neighborhood: An Overview of Our Solar System
Breaking
March 17, 2025

ASTORIA, Oregon – The Solar System, a vast and intriguing ensemble, serves as the cosmic neighborhood for Earth. Anchored by the Sun at its center, this celestial system comprises eight primary planets, each offering unique characteristics and mysteries. Mercury, the closest planet to the Sun, is a small, rocky world with extreme temperatures. Venus, often…

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March 16, 2025
Trump Hit by Spitball During SOTU Address, Warren Commission Concludes it Was a Lone Spitter
Politics
March 16, 2025

WASHINGTON DC – Eagle-eyed viewers who watched Donald Trump’s recent State of the Union address noticed what looked to be a spitball land on the left sleeve of his suit jacket midway through his speech.  Naturally, this sent shockwaves across the world.  Who would attempt to hit the leader of the free world with a…

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March 15, 2025
Andrew Cuomo Offers Freebies in Bid for NYC Mayoralty
Politics
March 15, 2025

NEW YORK, NY – Andrew Cuomo says he is ready to take a step up in the world and serve as mayor of New York City. The former New York Governor and U.S. Secretary of Housing and Urban Development said it would be “a great honor” to represent the people of New York in “a…

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March 14, 2025
Chaos Reigns at Yellowstone Park as Interior Department Demands Bears Return to Office
Politics
March 14, 2025

YELLOWSTONE, Wyoming – In addition to finding massive amounts of waste and fraud within the federal government, DOGE also demands federal workers to return to the office full-time.  Naturally, there is great resistance among many of the federal workers to do so. This has been a major topic for workers at Yellowstone Park, where representatives…

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