OSLO, Norway – Bowing to significant international pressure, the Nobel Committee has created a special award just for Donald Trump. They’ve even named it after him. The U.S. president is the inaugural winner of the Nobel Award for the Advancement of Linguistic Convention, already colloquially referred to as the Trump Prize.

First and foremost, the Committee praised Trump for his creative use of the language, citing his trend-setting use of words like “covfefe” and “smocking gun.” (Experts are still hotly debating the etymology of the former but have generally decided that the latter was a wholly intentional creation of a new term.)

Trump, after missing out on the coveted Peace Prize, pivoted expertly to accepting the new award, in a tweet that captured everything the Nobel Committee saw in his communcation skills: “Very honored to receive this great award! FINALLY! My tremondous contributions to the language are unpresidented!!! As for the Peace Prize, well, there’s always next year. It will surely be mine to loose.”

Vice-president J.D. Vance was quick to congratulate the president, saying that he has “benefited bigly” from reading Trump’s tweets over the years and has used the president’s language conventions as models for educating his own children. 

Another high-ranking Republican official launched a campaign to make the new award have the president’s face on the front. As it is now, every Nobel Prize winner gets a commemorative coin that has on the obverse (front) the face of Alfred Nobel and on the reverse (back) something that illustrates the specific award. This year’s Nobel Award for the Advancement of Linguistic Convention has on its reverse the Tower of Babel. The GOP official had no problem with that on the back.